- First of all, he was very much prone to throwing hissy fits when he did not get his way...check!!
- And he had a speech impediment that made him and unlikely leader and public speaker.....check.
- He also was living a comfortable life before God dragged him into a new line of work, leading a bunch of cranky people through the dessert while they complained at every step.....uh...check.
- He also contributed to a cause he never really got to see the end result of...check.
I personally think something about motherhood is a lot like being Moses. Unikely and ill-equipped leaders of a bunch of whiney brats, who complain about the food, break the rules, and who happen to make you mad enough to hit rocks and throw stuff. No? I defintely see the similarites.
It could also be that I am starting to get that what I am doing is something for God's kingdom that I may never understand, or never even get to see. Maybe Violet does not end up as our adopted child, but she sure needs the love and security these first few weeks of her life, and that could be why she is here. Or not.....I have no idea how God has this all worked out.
It may truly feel like 40 confused years wondering in the dessert, and we might not see where God is headed with all of it. Being content to a peice of the puzzle, and not the finished product, is not my strongest skill. So if any of you have that paticular gift, give me a holler. I could really use some pointers.
I love you... and I'm really happy that you're able to hear God's voice in all of this.
ReplyDeleteI don't have any pointers on that, except to keep holding on to the truth that God is not only the "puzzle maker," but the designer and placer of each individual piece. He knows the roller coaster - He built it! Hold on to the knowledge that He knows our future and plans it for our good, be it comfortable or uncomfortable good. Man, I'm getting to be an expert at uncomfortable good. Stay strong.
ReplyDeleteI have wrestled with God and come out with a limp. Faith is no small or pretty word, it is terrifying. You are indeed crossing the Red Sea and uncertainty awaits on the other side. You dare not let your heart to hope but it could be the Promised Land. I know that there are days when you feel you can do nothing better than cry over your helplessness, even Warriors have to cry. That is when you need your friends and family to hold you up and you have many. Hold on. In the meantime I will come out and throw rocks with you and even better I will sleep over and take some night shifts. Let me help. -Mom
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